What made my last Delhi trip special.. :-)

2022nd BLOG POST

Recently, I was in Delhi for an official trip for around two weeks. I remember days when I used to think why people are sent of an official tour and what purpose they serve being there. Some time has been travelled since then and I have been to Delhi thrice in last 8 months. There are certain agendas that you have to fulfill professionally but I look upon these trips also as a reason to celebrate my relations with few people with whom I have been physically away since last few years or I can say, decade, too. Hence, every time I am asked to be in Delhi, I make a list of people I wish to meet up whom I haven’t met since long.

 

There was a phase in life when I wasn’t doing great academically and because of few experiences, I had also gone into depression. This happened when I was in Junior college. Mostly, when you are in such state of mind, you seek support. The first people that you look forward to are your family members, relatives and friends. You are okay if your neighbors, classmates, colleagues aren’t with you but when the people with whom you expect support doesn’t turn out, you automatically start distancing yourself from them. The reason for this is not hate but love. Because we love them, we end up getting disappointed too when we don’t feel the same love getting reciprocated. It’s a different story when years later, you get matured and start thinking what you have done for others to expect anything from them - you realize that you have yourself been centered around your life without considering what others must be going through.

 

Well, coming back to the topic – this is the reason why I stopped visiting my relatives after a point of time. I didn’t attend important weddings of my cousins as well as didn’t become a part of a recent funeral too. None of this ever affected me. But I don’t know what happens sometimes to your whole structure of thoughts and notions that you break it in a second without worrying about what would you answer back to the people with whom you kept sharing about your resolution to not do certain things in future. I believe that the supreme force who’s controlling decides it for us. Something like that happened with me in my recent Delhi trip. I managed to meet all our close relatives. I met all my taujis, taijis, chachajis, chachijis, buajis, fufajis and even the cousins who were in town and showed equal interest in meeting me. It was such a pleasant experience.

 

After the trip, when I was traveling back, I was just thinking about what happened suddenly. I never talked with anyone much. I never tried meeting anyone before. How did I then end up meeting everyone in a single trip itself? Am I seeing life with a different lens over my eyes? Or are blood relations so strong that irrespective of whatever you think about each other or how far you live from each other – the bond ends up bringing everyone together in tough times? This is what we have kept seeing in our Bollywood movies, isn’t it? In the end, all the blood relatives end up coming together despite of not being on talking terms for life. Is there some truth to it? I don’t know. I am still thinking loudly.

 

The way everyone welcomed me in their home was so loving and pleasant that I am still in the same aura even after coming back to my home – my favorite city. No one can fake love. If there’s faking around, you can sense it well. But what I sensed was immense love, liking and well, sympathy for me too. I don’t like being sympathized but sometimes situations demand it and you should accept that too. I traveled with my cousins without having any elders around and I got to know them better than before. I saw my elders getting into senior citizenship and it scared me thinking that there will come a phase when we will start losing the older generation. Immediately, I felt more responsible and talked to myself on meeting everyone as much as possible. Maybe, these Delhi trips are planned by Universe to bring me closer to people with whom I share my blood and understand them more in order to learn more about life – including their perspectives too. Everyone has led their life differently and in every home that I stayed, I observed something very distinct from others. Yet, there was some similarity. And that I believe is because of the same family all of us belong to.

 

Because I don’t have my own siblings, I just hate calling my cousins as cousins because I treat all my younger ones as if they are my younger siblings. I like seeing them enjoying. I love spoiling them for the time-frame they are with me. Though I also become a bit obsessive about their careers later on and keep on insisting them to perform well but when I am there with them, I like seeing them spending their time with me on things they love doing. I am always open to them regarding spending my day as per their plan and likings. I impose nothing of mine. This is something I have missed all my life and I ensure I don’t let the opportunity go now.

 

After some years, all of them would be parents and will not be able to afford that immature carefree period anymore. Hence, I want to be there as much as possible with them – I know it’s selfish because I may be trying to fill that empty space in my life but it is also out of pure love for them. I wish best for them. When I find some of my brothers taller than me now, I understand the happiness my elders got seeing me getting taller than them. I used to think, then, as a child, about why do people feel happy seeing others getting taller and good-looking than them. I understand that so well now. I also get annoyed when I find them taking life too easy and spoiling their constructive years in destructive habits.

 

Well, in the end, I would like to ask all of you who are from my generation – Are we not becoming, thinking and preaching like our parents and relatives did which we never liked? Haha!

 

Thanks!

 

WRITING BUDDHA