Aa Dekhein Zara.. Kismein Kitna Hai Dum !!!

            549th BLOG POST -->>

       One day(5 years ago), I wanted to do something which was too important for my life (I can't disclose it here). I was almost prepared for it. I had a full confidence on myself that I will do it with an ease and smoothness. I was not very open with my parents then but I had a source of motivation. And you know who *she* may be. I thought, let's call her before approaching to accomplish this most wanted task of my life (according to the situations then). I called her but she wasn't picking it up. I kept recalling her and in response I only got an automated voice "The person you are trying to call is busy". I was too broken. Still I went to accomplish the work but I ended up screwing everything. I came back home and went to my bedroom with a very bad mood. I blamed myself for the failure. But, when I cooled down after some hours and I realized what influenced my positive approach towards my potential, I realized that just because she didn't picked up my call, I got screwed in this task. And I understood how someone can affect my life. 


          I am too emotional and thus it resulted in an outburst when she called me later on to confirm about my position- whether I lost or I won, by luck. I screamed at her and in the combat of words, I asked her to fuck off. And she was too egoistic to bear those two words from my sweet mouth and she broke the relationship. In short, she really fucked off. :-) Later, when I realized that I reacted too harsh and rude, I asked for an apology to her but her ego won again over our relationship. I lost my patience and I started dealing with my life too carelessly. I stopped eating, enjoying and moving ahead in life. Then one day, I went to Muktidham temple which was just 1 kilometer from my house. I went and sat there. I kept listening to bhajans and watching different people praying to God in some or the other way. After some time, a young pandit(he would be of some 25-27 years old then) came to me and sat besides me after giving me prasad. He started asking me about my studies, where I live, what does my parents do and almost everything. 


          After asking everything about me, he asked me to ask him any question which is making me isolate myself from my soul. I told him whatever happened to me without keeping any secret about the situation up to myself. He smiled and said,"See Abhilash, life is being given to you by the almighty-God. He never asked you to trust everyone. Neither did he said that everyone you meet is meant for you. It is you, your soul, your inner self who gets attracted towards people and you start believing some of them. Life is not about living alone either. Be with people but keep yourself intact about what you are. Never let anyone else dominate or influence you. Keep the confidence in yourself at its zenith. You should make your life and your body too stringent and stubborn that even if someone tries to break your confidence, you don't get moved by it. So, stop letting your life be affected by some people whom you found attractive. Show them that you are as good as you were even when they have left you to survive in a hell. The only people who can hurt you are the ones whom you allow to". After that, I thanked him and panditji went. 


          I came out of the temple and went to the restaurant. I ordered lots of food. All of them were my favorite dishes. Incidentally, I had money that day. :-) I was eating all those dishes to prove myself that I am not being affected by the person whom I tried to make a part of my life. After that, I went to an accessories shop and bought lots of accessories for me and I did almost all the things I liked. The words of Panditji kept echoing in my ears. "Don't let your life be affected by the people you find attractive in your life". How effective is the sentence. And that was the last day when I let anyone affect my life. 


            Now, I am not concerned about anyone else's life. I am too busy in my life and my goals. Neither do I give a damn to other's work and neither do I allow them to roam near the place where I work. I have become quite materialistic in this part of my life. Today, if someone will call me a thief in front of all the respected people, it will not affect me. If someone will call me a Gay in front of all the cool college students, it will not affect me. If someone will call me Dumb and Dull in an interview, it will not affect me. I have stopped allowing people to play with my life. Now, I hear whatever they speak about me and if I find it useless for the progress of my life, I ignore it. And this has resulted in a drastic positive change in my personality. Now I feel so confident about myself. Now, when I go for presenting a topic in class, I don't hesitate after listening to some comments about me. Now I don't feel ashamed when someone says that I blog for fame. Now I don't cry when someone abuses me for something I never did. Now, I am quite like punching-bag, keep hitting me but I will be as I was before. Your fist will start paining but my will of getting punched will still remain as excited as it was before. :-)


          So, my dear friends, stop getting affected by the people around you who are trying to pull you back, directly or indirectly. People can change your life only when you'll allow them to. If you will keep a control over yourself, no one can bring a change in yourself. So, be confident about yourself and ask all such people who try to pull you back to FUCK OFF !!!


          Thanks.


 ABHILASH RUHELA - VEERU

Samay Atcha ho ya Bura, ek din badalta jaroor hai !!!

            548th BLOG POST -->>

       A friend called me some 3 weeks ago and told me that she has failed in her 1st Semester of engineering's exam and she wants to quit everything. I asked her what "everything" meant. She replied,"Everything means whatever I am interested in. I will stop watching movies, singing songs, texting my friends, passing time by reading novels and almost everything which keeps me happy". I was, for once, shocked to hear her views about herself just because of a result which failed her in 3 subjects. I tried to give her her confidence back but it was very difficult as she made her mindset that she is good for nothing in this world where everyone is running for SUCCESS. I kept talking to her for 3 days continuously and finally, she believed that she has the potential to overcome the Failure and be the Queen of consistency and performance again. Formerly, she scored distinction in her 10th and first class in her 12th. It is just that she didn't knew how to handle Engineering. So, calling herself a failure for lifetime just because she failed for the first time in her academic career at 18th year of her life makes NO sense. 


            I always believe in one thing. I saw Badmash Company and one dialogue which got its place in my brain forever is "Samay atcha ho ya bura, ek din badalta jaroor hai". And yes this is true. Let the time be BEST or WORST, it is going to CHANGE one day for sure. And I never believed in this till my 10th std i.e. when I was 16 years old. I got this feeling when I came in Graduation. I saw that every moment of my life is so distinct from the one which passed. If I am happy today, I find that I was sad just 15 days ago. And after a month when I see my recent 30 days, I find that so many problem arose but went like the breeze of a storm. Nothing is still. Nothing is static. Everything is meant to be changed. Even if you will take relations which never changes E.g. A relationship of  Father-Son, even that changes with time. This relationship never changes but the way of interaction between father and son changes time to time. In school days, a son does not want his father to be at home because of his strictness. In college days, the same son starts meeting his father periodically to ask for money. And once he is in Engineering college, he starts talking about Girls with his father. And later on when he starts working in a corporate, he discusses all the problems and adventures of a job with his father than anyone else. This is how every moment changes the situation you are in.


           I can see my life as one of the best examples. Till 2nd std, I was the Topper of my school. When I came in 5th, I dropped to 15th rank. When I came in 6th, I scored 90% in one of the exams and I thought, I am back. Then, in 7th std, I reached upto 24th rank in the class. In 8th std, I was at 30th rank. In 10th std, I scored 61%. In 11th std, I failed for twice and I thought my life is over. After attempting 11th twice and never passing it, I filled the form for doing my 12th externally without any association with college. I passed it in a go with 55%. Then I filled up the form for BCA course in Bharati Vidyapeeth University. When the entrance exam's result was displayed, I found that I was the Top scorer among all the children who selected Mumbai as their center. Then, in my first semester, I scored 66%. Then in 3rd Semester, I dropped till 52%. And now in 5th semester, I have managed to balance my aggregate and I am at 57.5% now. So, this is now the situations and moment changes. 


            Till my 10th std, I was known for doing all the shits possible in my life. I was the one who stole the colony's most beautiful girl's father's underwear from their balcony and showed it to everyone in the school bus. I was the one who beat School bus driver just because he held my collar in front of my crush. :-) I was the one who blasted a sutli bomb on the door of an uncle's house; door started burning and he had to stop the fire by throwing 10-15 buckets of water for next 45 minutes. I was the one who threw condom's packets on the road where girls used to have their evening walk( and hided behind a tree) just to know what they think about sex. I was that crazy guy whom everyone's mom asked their son to be away from. I always felt that Life is fun. I did everything which very few children attempt. Then, I was sent to hostel in 11th std to a college which believed in only one religion which wasn't mine. I went through extreme tortures and I got to learn that life is not about fun, it is all about struggling and recovering. In my 12th std, I got to learn that I did something which is a crime for the society. I was targeted by everyone but somehow, I overcame from all those accusations from everyone who knew what I did. 


            Then, I entered Graduation and I got a girlfriend. I was very happy for all those days when she was with me. One day she left me and I realized how uncertain life is. It is not even predictable for the next moment from now. In the morning, she held my hand in pleasure and in the evening, she asked for a break-up. On the first day of college, I was too happy that everything was fine in my family except me and as I am on the track now, I will never let any problem arise in my family. On the 2nd day of the college, my father was at home after being sent to India by the European country he was working in. All the family problems regarding the job of my father started revolving around my brain. I thought that this is what every person used to call Life whenever he used to win a honorary award on television. Then, my father got his job back and I scored a very good marks in my first semester. Gradually, everything turned out to be smooth again. Sometimes, in my graduation(I am still giving my last semester), I was blamed for some thing but the very next day, I was appreciated for something which I never ever tried while attempting that. This is how Life changes in every moment. We can't justify the Border's song "Aey jaatey hue lamho zara tehro zara tehro" because any moment is made to pass by rather than to stay for too long with you- even if it's Good or even if it's Bad. :-)


             So, I just want to convey that, even if you are at a very high position, never ever turn arrogant because of it because even this may go one day. You can see how Vijay Mallya' airline- Kingfisher is struggling now-a-days. How Sachin Tendulkar is suffering to score every single run. And even if the moment is bad, don't feel low about it. Salman Khan, who gave back-to-back flop for 3 years is now an actor whom producers sign blindly knowing that he will make their movie get vindicated in 100-crore club. The player- Yuvraj Singh was known for his consistency in bad performance was the only player who was being trusted in World Cup 2011. So, every moment of your life will leave you after some time. These moments come just to see how you deal with it and how many avatars do you show among people. So, in such moments, keep your profile low rather than turning aggressive. Just keep this one sentence in your mind- "Samay atcha ho ya bura, ek din badalta jaroor hai".


             Analyze your life now after reading this.


   Thanks.


 ABHILASH RUHELA - VEERU

Keep MEMORIES in BRAIN, Not in PHOTOGRAPHS, IDIOT!!!

            547th BLOG POST -->>

       From last few months, there have been many instances when my friends have asked me to get the photos clicked while those moments when we were enjoying something which we never enjoyed with each other. Every time I abused them and made them sit quietly rather than take the snaps of those moments. My only reply to them has been: This is the moment which is meant to enjoy with each other. Why to waste some time of it by getting it snapped in the pictures which is not going to make us happy henceforth? But their reply has been: Abhilash, once we will be a Graduate, we will have nothing else than a marksheet to remember these moments. So, by clicking these pictures, at least, we can get back to these days and smile. I don't understand the basic logic behind this reason which they give me. I have been in relation 2 times. I don't see the pictures of both the girls periodically, but I have their faces as clear as possible in front of my eyes. I even remember each and every moment I passed with them. I have no video recordings, I have no voices but still I remember how they used to walk, talk, how their soothing voice used to flatten me, how their moving eyes used to move the direction of breeze for me, how their beautiful hands touched me etc. I don't need any photographs to remember their faces or the moments I have been through. I have met Chetan Bhagat, Sudeep Nagarkar and other writers, I have never asked them for a snap. Because I wanted to rejoice that golden moment rather than wasting a bit of it by getting my pictures snapped with them. 


            I have one more problem with photographs. It don't let you move ahead in life. It keeps you in those moments itself from where you started your journey. If I'll go into the Post-graduation course and I'll keep seeing the pictures of my Graduation time and Junior college time, I can never move ahead with life. I will keep missing those friends, those campuses and those funny moments. But if I'll keep all those photographs away from my life, it will make me easy to go through new challenges. I remember a friend I had in Aurangabad. One day, I asked him about his mother. He said, she is no more. I said, sorry, as usual. Then, I asked him if he has some picture of her with him through which she lives with him every time and encourages him to move ahead. He replied emotionally,"Abhilash, I was 10 years old when she left me. I was in 5th std and I remember all the moments when she loved me, fed me, scolded me and punished me. I have her face and touch so close to me that I don't need her picture. And her pictures will only add pain in my life. So, I have burnt all the pictures I had of my mother with me. I have kept none." I had tears in my eyes when he ended, I hugged him and both of us cried. That was the day when I realized how painful the pictures can be. 


             A next instance, one of my friend called me to college in Nashik. He asked me to be there urgently. I went. He started,"Buddy, I have some very serious problem. If I would have shared with someone else, whole college would have known it within one hour. But with you, I am sure that it will be between us. I need to tell you something and lighten the weight I'm carrying in my heart." I nodded him to speak. He began,"Abhilash, you know that I and Rupali have been together for last 6 months. Everything has been fine between us. She cares for me as a girlfriend should. She is exactly how I expect my partner to be. But there's a problem. Yesterday, her parents were out of town. She asked me to be there. And you know why (now, even my readers know that :-)). After doing all those love making events, I started browsing her computer while she was getting dressed up again. I found some pictures of her schooling days and 11th std. Man, she was too close to some people. Different boys had their hand in her waist in different pictures. I am just too shattered after seeing all this. Some of them even carried her so comfortably that I think whether her character is appropriate or she had it with many of them. I am in big dilemma about this relationship and the kind of connection she had with those boys". 


            After hearing this, I felt the case so obvious. Any boy who'll see that his girl has been very close and comfortable with other boys in the pictures, will feel insecure. In other case, even girl will. Let the Trust be 200% but still a doubt of 1% can overcome it. Don't you think so? See, you can be comfortable with boys/girls. But don't make it immortal by getting the picture clicked and getting it rotated among all the friends' computers that it can never be wiped out from your life even when you want to get away from your past. Even I am too close with all the female friends I have in my life. But I make it sure that when a picture is being clicked by someone, I am in that posture which shows that we have maintained distance with each other. I may walk with them hand-in-hand, that is our comfort level. But the boyfriend they'll get, the brother who can see these pictures anytime, the husband they'll get married to and the son they'll give birth to can obviously take these pictures and friendship in a negative sense and they may go into depression. I remember when a cousin sister just told me that I visit malls with 3 guys sometimes, I was like- Maa ki *****. I knew that something may happen. But I never saw her pictures. And I am happy about this. At least I don't have any dirty proof of it. Right? So, make it sure that you don't get those pictures clicked.


             Today, I see on Facebook that almost 80% of collegians have an album named "Goa" or "Traditional Day" or "A trip to so and so place". Now, when I open these albums and stalk the photos, I find them in quite cozy-kind-of-moments with the person of opposite sex who is just a FRIEND. Now, I don't have a problem with their comfort level with each other but I have a problem that why to show this to 700-800 Friends on FB? Come on, you don't become a dude by placing your hand on girls' waist in every other photograph and neither do you become a babe by falling on a smart-and-rich-guy's shoulder. Maintain distance when a picture is being clicked. Tomorrow, everyone of us will have a family and it is going to be too hard to explain your relationship with every person you met in life if you'll have images with them in almost all the folders you have in the disk. You can not even delete them because you got it clicked to keep it as MEMORIES. And I have also told you how the things remain in our memory which are close to us by giving the example of my 2 ex-girlfriends and that friend's mothers scene. 


             On many porn sites(Yes, I do visit them sometimes), I have seen that the girlfriend and boyfriend has made a video of their love-making scene and it is on Internet now. I don't know how these girls live after this video is being circulated everywhere in the world. I have no idea. Seriously. Take an instance, if you know that your partner has been in relation for 3 times before ceasing on you. For once you can be fine, but what if he/she has love-making videos on Internet with all those ex-partners? Just imagine. How hard it will be to accept. So, its upon you to decide how you want to get your picture clicked. Don't do all these things purposely just for being ostentatious and showing-off to others on Social Networking sites. Please, grow up now. 


     Said all I wanted to. Now don't ask me to grow up and take these things positively. I can't. And in this case, no one can.


   Thanks.


 ABHILASH RUHELA - VEERU